Left my medication at home.  I swear I'd lose my head. . .

I rely on action over words ( Read more... )

Answering the phone: "What the fuck do you want, fuck-face?"  is not appropriate for the work place.

THE FUCK IT ISN'T!

ETA:  From last job.

"Hello, welcome to Cook County, home of our world famous County Burger, and the Maria Pappas Milkshake, may I take your order please?"

"You're not allowed to go home for lunch breaks any more."

"DENIED."

"dictionary.com is loose and flippant with it's definitions."

"Dictionary.com has had a couple glasses of wine and doesn't much care for your accusations."

ALSO

Be happy or DIE

ALL YOUR BANKS ARE BELONG TO MEEEE!

NO MORE COMING TO WORK DRUNK.

        I have this fantasy sometimes, of uncovering some dastardly government plot or cover up.  Maybe some Mortgage company shenanigans (oh wait) and embarking on an adventure filled with danger and intrigue.  I'm up one night, working feverishly on refunds when I stumble across something that isn't quite right, after some digging I discover the ( Read more... )

G:  What does it take to fuck a light socket?
Me:  Fortitude and rubber soled shoes
G:  *through gritted teeth*  I'm soooo grounded right now.

      Danny ( Read more... )

( Read more... )